Posted by Rude One
In just six short months, it's become absolutely clear: Everyone who
didn't vote for Donald Trump was right and everyone who voted for him
was wrong. Yeah, yeah, they weren't wrong in that Trump won the
election, just as someone isn't wrong for supporting a shitty baseball
team. But it's incredibly clear now that the poor suckers and greedy
fuckers who wanted to nuzzle up to Trump's man-teats for a suckle were
wrong on just about every account regarding who he is and what he'd do.
They were wrong that he's a man of his word, they were wrong that he
would look out for working people, they were wrong that he would make
the nation respected "again" (as if it wasn't before), they were wrong
that he wouldn't have scandals, and they were just wrong about him being
a human being worthy of the office. They were wrong and we who voted
against him (and I'm tossing anyone who voted for Hillary Clinton, Jill
Stein, Gary Johnson, and Deez Nutz into the category of "voted against
him") were right.
Trump voters fucked the goat,
and so everything they say should be framed within the fact that they
are goatfuckers. "Oh, you have an opinion on health care? Sorry, you
fucked a goat. I don't give a shit about your goat-fucking opinion," we
should think. But that's not what we do. We don't shun the goatfuckers,
no matter how savagely they fucked that goat. We see that most clearly
by the fact that the news networks and other media outlets still
entertain the opinions of people who supported the Iraq war and never
said they were wrong about it. Goatfuckers get away with it.
So we're treated on an almost daily basis to articles and stories about
Trump voters and what they think about some issue and whether or not
Trump's evil, batshit incompetence is enough for them to bail on the
Orange King. Every single one of these stories is the same: Here are
some assholes who voted for Trump. Let's treat them with reverence, as
if they have hard-won wisdom because they shovel shit or work at
Wal-Mart. Let's tell them about all the fuckery that Donald Trump has
been up to and see what they think. Oh, look, they don't give a shit
because he still hates the Mooslems and Messicans. And what might change
their minds about Trumpochet? "I don’t know what he would have to
do...I guess maybe kill someone. Just in cold blood."
That's an actual quote from an actual person in a Tennesseean article
on Wayne County, Tennessee, an almost entirely white rural area with
less people than my neighborhood. The thrust of the piece is that Trump
voters couldn't give a happy monkey fuck about the Russia scandal. In
fact, they think Trump is being maligned and Don Jr. is awesome. This
is the newest wrinkle in the genre: What do stupid people think about
something they don't understand at all? In the last week, Vox has done a story on Michigan Trump voters, who don't think the Russian connections are any big deal. The BBC sent a reporter
to the Nebraska State Fair to get some American color (yes, ironic, I
know) and some video of deluded shit heels sharing their delusions.
As Newsweek's Alexander Nazaryn wrote,
"The real story here is how thoroughly Trump supporters have been
deceived, both by Trump and tireless boot-lickers like Hannity and
Jones. Every quote from an Ohioan who declares the Russia investigation
is irrelevant is a testament to the delusive brand of Republicanism that
now reigns supreme." Joshua Green said much the same in the New York Times.
Each of the Trump voter pieces generally has a token interview with
someone who doesn't support Trump. But they are presented as
curiosities, the two-headed cow that shouldn't exist but somehow does.
But the reality is, obviously, people who think Trump is full of shit
vastly outnumber the aforementioned suckers and fuckers who stand by
their man. How about interviewing some of us? How about asking us, "How
did you know?" And we can say, "Anyone with a fuckin' brain knew." Ask
us, "What do you think about the Russia dealie?" And we can say, "Either
we do something about it or we're fucked."
Hell, you don't even have to stick to the cities, where the majority of
the country lives. Since you've got a rural jones, you can head to
Bolivar, Tennessee, a town in the ass-crack of nowhere, near to the
Alabama border, as Deep South as you can get. They went
for Hillary Clinton, as did nearby Whiteville. Of course, those are
majority African American towns, so you'd have to change the whole
goddamned narrative away from the mighty white working class.
Or, here's an idea, why not go to the communities that went for Trump
and find the people who didn't. Talk to them. See if they're feeling
smug or sad or angry. See what their ideas are for getting us out of
this or through this goddamn bullshit time. Find out how they're feeling
about Trump's relationship with Russia. Ask them because they, like the
majority of the country, were right.
Let's spend a little time and energy, dear, sweet reporters, on people who aren't barking mad or madly barking.
(Note: If you didn't vote at all, go suck a donkey's dick.)
(Note: If you wanna write to me about "goatfucker shaming," I hate you
already. Same for "donkey-dick sucker shaming." Some things are just
fucking shameful. Sucking a donkey's dick, fucking a goat, and voting
for Donald Trump, for examples.)
We really need to talk.
Whether you’re a 20-something fresh off the campaign trail, or a seasoned Washington insider serving in the Cabinet, by now you’re painfully aware that you’re not making America great again; you’re barely making it to the end of the daily news cycle before your verbally incontinent boss, the putative leader of the free world, once again steers the proverbial car into a ditch. On every front, you’re faced with legal, political and moral hazards. The president’s job, and yours, is a lot harder than it looked, and you know the problem originates in the Oval Office.
[I was fired for criticizing Trump. Getting rid of people like me hurts his agenda.]
You hate that people are shying away from the administration jobs in droves: Just this week, in rapid succession, both Sen. John Cornyn and Rep. Trey Gowdy withdrew their names from consideration as replacements for former FBI Director James Comey, the guy your boss fired. Whatever department you’re in, it’s a safe bet that it’s a whispering graveyard of empty appointments and unfilled jobs.
I know: Many of you serving in Cabinet, sub-Cabinet and White House roles joined Team Trump in good faith, believing you could help steady the ship, smooth the rough edges and, just maybe, put some conservative policy wins up on the board. You could see that President Trump’s undisciplined style was risky, but you hoped the big show playing over at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. would provide you with cover to work steadily and enthusiastically on the administration’s legislative priorities.
Some of you even bought into the ‘Merica First new nationalism. Many of you quietly assured friends in the Washington ecosystem that Trump would settle into his job — after all, just a few days after taking office, he assured us, “I can be the most presidential person ever.”
Instead, your president botched Trumpcare 1.0 and contributed little as House Speaker Paul Ryan managed to ram public-relations nightmare, Trumpcare 2.0, through the House at the cost of much political blood and treasure. Instead, Trump’s fumbles have left many members of Congress ducking town hall meetings like they’re in the Witness Protection Program. The DOA tax bill and the rest of Trump’s agenda are deader and more pungent than six-day-old fish. Maybe your particular bureau is still afloat, but you’re really not doing much except playing defense and wondering which of your colleagues is leaking to The Washington Post.
You learned quickly that your job isn’t actually to serve the nation, manage your agency or fulfill the role you ostensibly play according to the White House org chart. In reality, you spend most of your time fluffing Trump’s ego. Either that or you’re making excuses for not being a more aggressive suck-up. If you’ve been ordained to appear on television as an administration surrogate, you know by now that your task isn’t to advocate for your agency or issue, but to lavish the president with praise.
[I support Trump, but firing Comey was wrong]
Now, you see the daily train wreck; you see a White House in turmoil and a president drawing an ever-tighter circle of family and corporate vassals around himself. You worry that the scandals and legal troubles, that have been rumbling on the horizon like a summer thunderstorm, are drawing nearer. You should worry.
Every day you get up, slide into the seat of your Prius or Tahoe (and if you’re senior enough, exchange a few polite words with your driver) and start checking Twitter. Whatever it is that you’re feeling, it doesn’t feel anything like Morning in America. It feels like some faraway kleptocracy where the center hasn’t held, the airfield and radio station have fallen to the rebels, and the Maximum Leader is holed up in his secret bunker waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Soon (and by soon, I mean now) you’ll have to make a choice. You’ll have to decide if I’m here to help has morphed into I’m helping this president dismantle the republic. In D.C., principle is as rare as hen’s teeth, but, GOP friends, I’m here to help you.
You already know you can’t save the president because he doesn’t want to be saved. You already know there’s not another, better version of Trump getting ready to show up. You’re smart. You’re loyal. You’re sniffing the wind like a gazelle, nose filled with the scents of predators. You don’t want to break from the pack too soon, but there’s greater risk in waiting too long.
When regimes collapse, dead-enders are the most fascinating to watch — the ones who end up with the profitable concessions and sought-after mistresses. You know already, though, that’s probably not you. So, when this regime falls, ask yourself, do you want to be among those who said not me, or do you want to go out like a Ba’ath Party generalissimo?
Sticking with Trump to the bitter end and pretending the unfolding chaos is just “fake news” won’t save your reputation as the walls close in. It won’t ease the judgment of history. It won’t do anything to polish up your future Wikipedia entry.
Cutting ties with a man who is destructive to our values, profoundly divisive, contemptuous of the rule of law and incontrovertibly unfit to serve in the highest office in the land just might. Do it now.