Donald Trump's amazing tax returns!

August 24, 2016

To Whom it may Concern:

I am an tax attorny and have graduated number one (1) in my class from a prestigeous institution.

Since 1996, I have had hte distinct honor and privilige of preparing Mr. Trump's tax returns.

They are amazing, truly amazing. He has the best tax returns. The best.

I have shown the tax returns to collegues and they are always amazed. Always.

I can assure you that Mr. Trump's income is among the highest in the world. Probably is the highest in the world.

Well, it would be the highest in the world if liberals like Bill Gates and rapists like Carlos Slim didn't cheat.

And lie.

Mr. Trump is also the most generus man I have ever met. He has made more charitible contributions than anyone in all of history.

His charity cannot be matched!

Despite all the deduction he can take, Mr. Trump actually insists on overpaying his taxes! Why?

Because Mr. Trump knows that the country would collapse if the government ran out of money. And Mr. Trump has money!

Lots of money! He's rich! Really, really rich!

He knows that he is the only person -- the ONLY person! -- who can save us, so he overpays his taxes to keep America running.

I can also assure you that Mr. Trump taxes show no ties or obligations to anyone. He is his own man!

He is absolutely NOT paying 138.47% annual interest rate to Russian mobsters since 2004.

He is also unconditionally NOT paying the firm of Dewey, Burnham, & Howe to provide insurince so that none of his incredible buildings burn down.

Finally, Mr. Trump has been audited many times because liberals in the IRS are out to get him because he tells the truth!

But Mr. Trump has not yet been formally convicted of any wrongdoing!

I can't say anything about pending indictments because Mr. Trump has an entire separate legal team to handle all his indictments.

In conclusion, Mr. Trump's tax returns are incredible! Very presidential!


Sinceerly,


Donald J. Trump's Tax Man