Friday, December 7, 2012

Citigroup leads finance world in bullshit-generating capacity

By Derek Thompson

Citigroup announced that it is cutting 4% of its workforce this morning, in what might be the most remarkable incident of concentrated euphemistic corporate jargon I've ever seen:
"Citigroup today announced a series of repositioning actions that will further reduce expenses and improve efficiency across the company while maintaining Citi's unique capabilities to serve clients, especially in the emerging markets. These actions will result in increased business efficiency, streamlined operations and an optimized consumer footprint across geographies." [Bold phrases are my emphasis]
In other words:
"Citigroup today announced [lay offs]. These actions will [save money]."
The lay offs, which will save $1.1 billion annually in spending, are one of the first moves by new CEO Michael Corbat, who stepped in for outgoing chief executive Vikram Pandit two months ago.

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