dlevere's blog: Sam Nunberg Bit His Own Dick Off On Jake Tapper’s CNN Show

By Evan Hurst

LORD HAVE MERCY.

Former Trump aide/current idiot Sam Nunberg hung up his Obamaphone with MSNBC’s Katy Tur on Monday afternoon, and by the time we had posted the full video, he had picked that Obamaphone right back up to call CNN’s Jake Tapper, to continue his very sane temper tantrum about how Robert Mueller is not the boss of him, essentially daring the special counsel to arrest him for refusing to comply with a subpoena.

On Tur’s show, Nunberg said YEAH PROBABLY seems like Mueller has evidence of Donald Trump committing crimes during the campaign. On Tapper’s show, Nunberg expanded on that idea, saying BIG DUH, of course Donald Trump knew his crap-faced firstborn son was having a Russian conspiracy meeting with a bunch of Russian spies, because Trump was talking about it A WEEK BEFORE IT HAPPENED, like some kind of person who just loves doing conspiracies with Russia. WHOA IF TRUE, and holy shit, we bet it is! (Just like Steve Bannon said!)

BREAKING NEWS: After Sam Nunberg told Jake Tapper that Trump knew about Donald Trump, Jr.’s meeting at Trump Tower with Russians, Robert Mueller has offered him a deal: There will never be any charges if he agrees to keep going on Jake Tapper’s show. https://t.co/xKFL6n8SvD
— Mrs. Betty Bowers (@BettyBowers) March 5, 2018

Nunberg also told Tapper, without hesitation, TWICE, that Trump campaign Russian intelligence asset idiot Carter Page was definitely colluding with the Russians, DEFINITELY.

Sam Nunberg: “Carter Page was colluding with the Russians.” pic.twitter.com/Z83TxOjrfn

— Axios (@axios) March 5, 2018

HOO BOY!
And just for good measure, here is another clip where Nunberg states his belief, just like he did for Katy Tur, that Robert Mueller has “something” on Trump:

Sam Nunberg: “When they start asking for stuff like this, Trump is right. It is a witch hunt.”
Also: “They know something on him. And Jake, I don’t know what it is. Perhaps I’m wrong. But he did something.” pic.twitter.com/CQ00slXROs
— Axios (@axios) March 5, 2018

And here’s the one where Sam Nunberg says Trump is an “idiot” for admitting to NBC’s Lester Holt that he fired James Comey because of the Russia investigation, and also for inviting Russians into the Oval Office so he could jizz some classified secrets all over them, and now everything is terrible and Sam Nunberg has all these legal fees, because Donald Trump is an “idiot”:

😂😂😂
Nunberg: Granted, Donald Trump caused this because he’s an idiot … he gave an interview to Lester Holt after firing Comey then decided to have Russians in the Oval Office. You have to explain that one to me.
Tapper: I’m not going to be able to explain that to you, Sam. pic.twitter.com/c3zpxOQhA2
— Lis Power (@LisPower1) March 5, 2018

And finally, here is the part where Sam Nunberg asks Jake Tapper for legal advice, to which Jake Tapper replies that if he were in Nunberg’s shoes, he would cooperate, because “Sometimes life and special prosecutors aren’t fair.” Oh. My. God. This. Really. Happened.

NUNBERG: “Do you think should I cooperate? Should I spend 80 hours going over my e-mails, Jake?”
TAPPER: “If it were me, I would. Just asking my opinion. Because it sounds like pain. But he is the special counsel and he does have the long arm of the law.” pic.twitter.com/N8PFFNS5Ai
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) March 5, 2018

OK, for a palate cleanser, here are the five funniest tweets we saw after looking for seven seconds for funny tweets about Sam Nunberg and his afternoon TV meltdown of hilariousness: